15 Things I Learned in 2024
Photo by @hannahbatchelorphotos
15 Things I Learned in 2024 (narrowing it down but there is so much)
• Depriving myself of necessary nutrients for a moral belief is misguided and doesn’t truly help anyone.
• It can be deep, but it doesn’t have to be.
• We’ve been gifted this body to love and care for, it’s our responsibility to parent ourselves as adults.
• Most people are passively compliant and generally unhappy. There are very few who truly enjoy life, and I’m determined to be one of them.
• Many people have shockingly low standards for romantic relationships. I didn’t realize how beautiful and possible it is to exist in a truly healthy, respectful, and understanding dynamic.
• Rest. No one else will take the break for you, and no one will save you when you burn out.
• Slowing down and doing less has created space for so much more abundance in my life.
• Food/lifestyle is medicine. This year, I’ve relied on pharmaceuticals less than ever before.
• Relationships are everything, and the environment you’re in absolutely matters.
• I deeply crave like-minded community but often struggle between expressing my quirky, deep, spiritual side and toning it down to seem more “normal” and likeable.
• I have far less control over external circumstances than I’ve been led to believe. Surrender, accept, and flow.
• My practice is my safe space, it will always be there when I need it.
• People don’t think about you nearly as much as you imagine. Do things because you want to. Looking outside yourself for validation will never make you feel whole.
• Creativity is infinite. I’ve let go of the fear that everything I share has to be revolutionary, there will always be more to create.
• I don’t need to have it all figured out yet.
I’m writing this on the winter solstice of 2024, a time when the year’s end invites us to reflect inwardly. This year, like most, has been a rollercoaster. But for the first time in my life, I’ve felt a sense of stability amidst the chaos.
I’ve written this as a letter to myself, and I am filled with gratitude for the beauty of hindsight. It's powerful to see growth unfold through storytelling, to witness how far I've come and how much I’ve learned. I can't wait to see what next year brings.
At the end of last year, I moved into my partner’s house. Not long after, he went away for work over Christmas and New Year's. I missed him deeply, and the quiet of winter gave me an abundance of space to reflect. Let’s just say, it drove me a little crazy. I was missing the tools I needed to cope, which led to a deep depression and feelings of despair. I took January off work to rest mentally and vocally as I had been longing to do for some time, only to find that the boredom worsened my state. I was experiencing anhedonia and craving a shake-up.
We went to Morocco, I became more aware of the fact that my discomfort and emotional state was going to follow me wherever I tried to escape to. I was also initially shocked by the widespread animal abuse that’s normalized in the culture. This was my first significant shake-up call. I spent time reflecting on my relationship to veganism and activism, realizing that self-sacrifice in the name of a cause beyond your control is a form of martyrdom that ultimately helps no one.
Simultaneously, my depression and fatigue worsened, and I was forced to visit the doctor. The diagnosis: a B12 deficiency. The symptoms? You guessed it. Depression, anxiety and fatigue. I had to make dietary and lifestyle changes once again, relearning and reprogramming myself to accept aspects of life I had been in denial about for a long time. I asked for a shake-up and definitely got one. Always mind what you wish for!
By February, I was ready to restart therapy. A wonderful therapist helped me process so much, and within just four sessions, I felt a renewed excitement for the future. She taught me how to parent myself, set boundaries, and encouraged me to return to my day job for the summer. Living a lifestyle and relying solely on a career full of late nights, alcohol, and vocal strain was no longer sustainable, but the idea of being surrounded by morning people actively progressing with their lives brought me a sense of hope and sweetness.
She also made me aware that many of my challenges were beyond my control: big, unanswered questions. She suggested I find ways to entertain myself in the meantime so that my life wouldn’t be consumed by constant rumination on these deep topics. During this process I was also reminded that I don't have to take everything so seriously. It's only me ever creating the pressure for myself.
On my birthday in May, I was feeling much better. We had a celebration at our house, where my mom and I cooked an incredible spread, and many of our friends came to celebrate. I felt overwhelmed with gratitude and joy during those days. It was the first time in a long time I had felt a sense of community and belonging. I will forever hold that memory close to my heart.
In the summer, I returned to work as a stand-up paddleboard instructor at the beach. I also continued performing gigs, but it was crucial for me to set boundaries with myself and others regarding how much time and energy I could give. It was the most balanced season of my life so far—working, resting, and playing. Apart from a few usual hiccups, I think I managed well.
Throughout the summer, I reflected on the idea of choice and work. Once you have stability and things in order, how do you want to spend your time? With some free time on my hands, a lunch with a friend helped me re-discover my passion for health, wellness, and holistic practices. This led me to complete my long-overdue yoga teacher training and launch TULA Holistic Wellness—a space where I can share my quirky, spiritual, and “crunchy” side and hopefully serve others by sharing my journey.
Despite working less than ever during the summer, I somehow saved up more money than I expected. I took the whole month of November off to travel with my partner. We went on an epic road trip through northern Spain and Portugal. As amazing as the trip was, I deeply longed for a community to come home to. That longing, however, allowed me to learn more about presence—being okay with where you are, even when you’re not okay.
Before the trip, my recently bought car experienced an electrical malfunction that is still challenging to fix. Everywhere I turn, I face obstacles, and I still don’t have a solution. This has become an ongoing lesson in surrender and patience. The situation is out of my control, and my stress will not resolve it any faster. Instead, I’m choosing to hold gratitude for the safety and abundance in my life, knowing that the best possible outcome is on the horizon.
This year has taught me so much about myself, especially in terms of embracing my femininity. I'm still learning how to create for myself as a form of expression, not just as people pleasing services to help me get paid. I’m learning to soften and flow with life, allowing my creativity to run wild.
We’re kicking off 2025 with a trip to Sri Lanka. I have no idea what this year will bring, but I’m deeply grateful to be here to experience it all.
Thank you to everyone who’s been a part of my life this year. I love you all.
Sending love,
Dani x
